According to the new, proposed Local Courts Bill under review in Malawi’s Parliament, public flatulence (aka: farting) will be an offense punishable by a minimum of 6-months in jail. Now, although this will make 12-year-old boys (and, honestly, most of us) giggle, the passage of natural bodily gas is no laughing matter around this house. Between the parasites, the amoebas, the schistosomiasis, the cabbage and beans, we are truly at risk of being accused, and convicted, at any time. Our risk of confinement aside, the article in the Nyasa Times is hysterical, and hysterically written. You really should check out the comments at the end.
And, if that is not enough, other “crimes” that would now carry a mandatory jail term include:
“Pretending to tell fortunes”
“Insulting the modesty of a woman”
“Carrying offensive weapons without lawful authority or reasonable excuse”
“Challenging to fight a duel”
“Dealing in poisonous substances in negligent manner”
Public response is mixed. "'How can this government criminalise the release of intestinal gases …. Everyone does that, even if it’s in public or it has an accompanying sound which is boring, making it criminal is a joke of democracy.' Another said he, 'support(s) the bill and is welcome. Sometimes breaking wind in public or during meetings is a disturbance of the peace.'"
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